Poem: ‘On Tooting Bec’

There’s parakeets in the Common
(Sea horses in the Thames)
Crows on all the branches
And rain that never ends

White swans upon the water
Crack’d conkers on the ground
Great burls on every tree trunk
And pigeons all around

I walked the trodden pathways
Past fields and ponds and woods
Looked up at leafy heavens
And remembered all I could

~ c.p.grisold

Recipe: Basic veg stock

This recipe is from Front Door Organics, the company that I get my fruits & veg delivered by. You can read the original post here.

Sunday is a great day for making a veggie stock, not only because then you have a home-made stock on hand for use during the week, but you can use any veggie off cuts that you collect in the week prior (think onion and carrot butts, mushroom stalks, celeriac peel, the tops of leeks, and more). The essential basis for any vegetable stock is a mirepoix – a ratio of 2:1:1 of onions, celery, and carrots – but you can add many other different vegetables to achieve great flavours.

Now, no stock should be used as a vegetable graveyard – to yield great flavour you need good quality organic vegetables in tip-top condition. Also, cooks and chefs will tell you that there are certain things that should never be used in stocks. Although not everyone will always concur on the ‘rules’ most will agree that turnips and rutabagas are not suited to stocks, neither are broccoli, cabbage, kale and other brassicas – just think of the smell of the vegetable steaming – anything too pungent is not generally used. Also avoid using ground spices or excessive amounts of greens as this will make the stock bitter.

Here are a few more tips to keep in mind when making a vegetable stock:

– Cook at a lively simmer uncovered
– Do not salt the stock rather add salt when you using the stock in your soups and sauces
– Skim any froth or foam that forms on the surface for a clear stock
– Do not stir or agitate the stock if you are trying for a clear final product
– Cut vegetables into chunks about 1 – 2 inches wide
– Only simmer vegetable based stocks for 45 minutes at the most
– Don’t allow a stock to stand after cooking, drain immediately and store in clean glass jars in your fridge

YOU WILL NEED:

1 large onion
2 celery stalks
2 carrots
1 garlic clove, slightly squished
2 quarts water
1 tablespoon of olive oil
2 bay leaves
2 sprigs of parsley
1 sprig of thyme
8 black peppercorns
Leftover vegetable pairings


NOTE:
Make a bouquet garni with the herbs and the peppercorns – FDO uses tea sachets that you can often find in Asian grocery stores (they are re-usable and compostable, too). Cheesecloth, which is what I use, will work fine also and can be washed and re-used. (Although I do not wash and re-use mine!)


I got my tea sachets in a giftbag at The Design Exchange’s Black & White Gala, but I’m sure you can buy them at Fresh & Wild, as they carry the Nourish Tea line… or any actual tea shop, like David’s. My package of cheesecloth is from the dollar store. Maybe I should have bought non-bleached cheesecloth, but whatchagonnado?

DIRECTIONS:

In a large soup pot, heat the olive oil over medium to high heat and add the onions, celery and carrots. Cook until they start to brown then add the water, other vegetable pairings you may or may not be using, the squished garlic, and the herb sachet. Bring to a boil, then reduce the heat until you have a lively simmer. Simmer for about 45 minutes, skimming any froth that may form on the surface.


To strain, place a layer of cheesecloth inside a mesh sieve set over a large bowl. Very gently pour the stock through the sieve being careful not to agitate the stock too much. The cheesecloth will catch any of those tiny particles that will cloud your stock. When it is fully drained, remove the cheesecloth and compost the contents (the cheesecloth will rinse clean very easily in hot water if you are re-using it).

Transfer the stock to a nice clean jar and refrigerate. It will last in your fridge for at least a week and is useful for more than just soups! Great for thinning sauces, braising vegetables in or for using as a base to make an elaborate sauce. Remember to season it as you use it. (Salt addicts like me have a hard time waiting to add it, but I try to salt my soup after I’ve served it individually – to taste – so that the whole soup doesn’t get overly salty.)

One of the other pluses of ordering fruits & veg from FDO is that they always include great recipes with your Good Food Box. It’s also just so nice to not have to lug all those f&v home (even though I do have a new stylish damask-patterned not-so-granny cart that I received at Christmas from J&M). And yes, finding a Good Food Box waiting on your doorstep is just like a visit from Santa – my kind of Santa anyway.

Enjoy!

x

Detoxification of the ‘bo

If you have read my Resolutions post, you will know that I am giving up pork for 2011. This is mainly for ethical reasons, as the pig is my most favourite of the animals to devour. So versatile! So compatible with eggs! And eggs, afterall, are another one of my favourite foods. I just love anything that comes in its own package. And they are so cute! And also versatile. Maybe I love versatile food? Hmm. I also love sea salt. And goat’s dairy. And tomatoes. And lemons. And cilantro. And hummus. Actually, if I had to pick only one food to eat for the rest of my life, it would be hummus. I honestly eat it with my fingers. No time for pita! Get me straight to the source!

Anyway, the point is, if you take yourselves a gander at my favourite foods, you will see that they are all relatively healthy. I do not list hamburgers or chocolate milk or Jos Louis up there. My body craves natural foods. And it works at its best when it receives them.

I know it’s hard to always eat healthy. Since I returned to my apartment from the ‘rents house for Christmas, I was surviving mainly on Turtles, Orange Pekoe, and toast. Not good. So I decided enough was enough, and after watching a program on W late the other night about which foods are toxic for you, I decided to get thee to a grocery and stock up on the healthy stuff. Because it is not a chore for me to eat well – I’m just incredibly lazy and will always eat whatever is closest to reach. If my fridge is full of stupid fruits and vegetables – I mean, delicious healthy snacks – then I will choo-choo-choose them over the Turtles. Well, for the most part. (I did sneak in an after-breakfast Turtle this morning.)


Mmm… I love breakfast.

I am aware of what is good for me and what isn’t. I believe that everyone has their own Grocery List of what is best for their bodies. I have been mainly vegetarian since I was 16, and although I do eat meat, I only consume it on average once a week or less. (When I live with my parents, who are carnivores, I do eat it more often, but usually come to regret it.) Red meat is my favourite; I don’t like white meat at all. But since I do not eat beef anymore (6yrs and counting!), and I can’t afford to pick up lamb or game at the butcher shop on a regular basis, I actually eat red meat probably four times a year at most. In London I could pick up a venison pie at the local fish-n-chips shop, or game soup at Sainsbury’s. But there are strict rules about game in Canada thanks to the Wildlife Act. Which sucks because we have tonnes of delicious animals roaming our land, just meandering to be masticated. *smacking lips*



The thing with meat, for me anyway, is that it changes my entire diet. If I’m eating pork, I will have a ham sandwich for lunch. Usually with cheese, bread (duh), and mayo. But if I’m not eating meat, I will have hummus and veg instead. Or goat’s cheese, tomato and basil salad. My meat-eating diet revolves around three major food groups: MEAT, CHEESE, BREAD. Whereas my veg diet revolves around LEGUMES.

I have been fully vegetarian before, even vegan for six months when I was studying at Uppsala University. This was very hard because my body CRAVED cheese (clearly not getting enough calcium), and one night after a fest at Stockholms Nation, I bought what I thought was a vegetarian baguette (they sell baguettes after the bar in Sweden, like how we in Toronto sell vendor dogs… no wonder Swedes are better looking than us). I took a bite whilst walking home with a German friend, and thought to myself how delicious the red cabbage was… when it hit me… MEAT!!! It was a ham baguette. My friend asked if I wanted him to take it away from me, and I honestly snarled at the guy. My veganism ended that night, and I pretty much had a ham sandwich every day for breakfast for the rest of my time there.

It is hard for me to commit to vegetarianism since I do love to eat meat, but I found it wasn’t as hard to give up as when I detoxed off coffee in 2005! I had a headache for three months. Though I haven’t drunk coffee more than a handful of times since then. I would like to get back into it, but not in the “double-double” way. I prefer my coffee thick and strong and bitter, like Turkish coffee or proper Italian espresso, and always after a meal. Not as a pick-me-up on my way to work. And I don’t put cream or sugar in there. I love the taste of coffee. Especially when paired with a lemony dessert.

Speaking of delicious lemony desserts, my friends and cousins M&M and I were out in Oakville shopping over the holidays, and stopped for lunch at the most charming crêperie! It is called The Crêpe Kitchen and is on Dunn Street, just south of Lakeshore, near Trafalgar (the cute part).





M&M and I each had our own savoury crêpe, and then shared one with lemon and sugar for dessert. That is my favourite of the crêpes as it always reminds me of being a child at Frieth C.E.C. School in the U.K., where we had a cook (the ancient Miss Butler) who prepared all our meals. I had lemon-sugar crêpes there, and every time I’ve had them since, it always brings me back to that one-room schoolhouse in the Chiltern Hills.

Anyway, I’m getting off-topic here. What I wanted to share with you was my detoxification Grocery List that I hope to stick with for the next 4 months or so:



– Goat’s milk (homo)

– Coconut milk

– 10% M.F. plain yogurt (I was going to buy the goat’s yogurt but it was half the size of the cow’s milk, for the same price. I told myself I can’t afford to detox that thoroughly right now. Oh and I always buy high milk fat yogurt. Will not eat 0% M.F. as it’s usually made with gelatin, and honestly I despise the goupy-ness of it. High milk fat yogurt tastes like a dream in a plastic tub.)

– Frozen O.J. (the only juice I buy, other than Mott’s Clamato lol)

– Chick peas

– Red lentils

– Tinned tomatoes with Italian herbs

– Frozen fruit blend (strawberries, grapes, melon, etc.)

– Frozen peaches & cream corn (frozen veg is better than tinned because it doesn’t have the added salt or sugar)

– Frozen chopped basil (my sneaky cheat, have the cilantro one too)

– Ginger, Mint & Fennel tea (to add to my 35+ tisane varieties)

– Sundried tomatoes in oil (a splurge at $3.49!)

– Sweet basil & tomato pasta sauce

– Blue corn Tostitos (am addicted to salsa)

– Triscuits (they were on special at $1.99, and who doesn’t love a Triscuit?)

– Vegetable hummus

– Eggplant hummus

– Soft goat’s cheese

– Bag o’ carrots

– Baking potatoes

– Sweet potatoes

– Bananas

– Savoy cabbage (so curly!)

– Celery

– Garlic & ginger root

– Baby arugula

– Grape tomatoes

– Bag o’ lemons

– Red Delicious apples (my favourite kind, and actually the most nutritious, due to their dark skins… however, also the easiest to taste woody if you don’t eat them when they’re fresh)

– Red grapefruits (these were covered in a strange sparkly coating, I think maybe the wax to make them shiny? Just shows you to thoroughly wash your fruits ‘n’ veg after purchasing at supermarket. Also why I prefer to buy organic, but can’t always afford them.)

I already have on hand things like frozen fish, shrimp, quiche (made with farm-fresh eggs), veg stock, Indian spices, tahini, nori – you know, your average pantry items :o)

And for breakfast today I had organic green tea with jasmine, orange juice, plain yogurt topped with honey, cinnamon, and muesli, and half a red grapefruit (thoroughly scrubbed). Oh and of course my dietary supplements de choix of acidophillus, fiber pills, Vitamin C chewable tablet (mmm…so good), and Greens+ Glow multi-vitamin. Not a bad start to the day.



Will keep you posted (pun intended) on my detox progress. I did have a glass of Californian Pinot Noir last night at dinner (rigatoni with sundried tomatoes, goat’s cheese, and arugula). Have decided Cali Pinot is my fav red. It used to be Cali Zinfandel (not the pink stuff!), but I’m heading back to my old medium-bodied ways methinks. Anyway, will blog about wine some other day. In the meantime, if you want to increase your oenological learnings, I recommend visiting the website of the lovely Angela Aiello of iYellow Wine Club.

Bon apétit!

x

Travel: Coco Gets Around

This hobo, like most, is a travellin’ hobo. I move once, sometimes twice, a year. Usually within the same neighbourhood (i.e. I once lived in three apartments between 2004-2005 within a 15min radius in Lawrence Park). Sometimes I move out of Toronto, sometimes I move back to the ‘rents in Miltonia (shudder, no offence Momsies). Sometimes I pack my bags and move out of the country. I guess I’m just a vagabond at heart. For someone who lives out of a bag as often as I do, you’d think I’d be a better packer. But not only am I the world’s worst jogger – I am also the world’s worst packer. I didn’t even pack a scarf when I went home for Christmas. Don’t ask – I don’t know either.

However, as much as I hate living out of a bag, I do love to travel. Maybe that’s why I move so often. (Although my Daddy-O would argue that I move so often in order to force him to carry boxes up and down stairs repeatedly.) It’s always good to get a fresh perspective on life.

Rollin’ with the hobo’s…

So far, I have been to the following countries:

– Canada (duh)
– Denmark
– England
– France
– Gibraltar
– Ireland
– Sweden
– Spain
– USA
– Wales

Not very many when you look at that list. Sure, I actually LIVED in three of those countries, but there’s so many other ones I would like to visit. Top of my list are Morocco, Greece, and Scotland.

Due to the nature of the ‘bo, I usually embark upon shoestring travel. One of the things I like to do most is take impromptu trips only for a night or two, but with a specific purpose. Like when I spent a night in Gibraltar and had dinner in a hotel atop the infamous Rock, looking out over the Mediterranean as a crescent moon rose, with Northern Africa’s Atlas Mountains shadowed in the distance. Or when I travelled something like 29hrs over three days just to drink a Guinness in Ireland (I planned to only stay one night but got stranded when the ferries were cancelled indefinitely due to bad weather). Or when I went north of the Arctic Circle to see Sweden’s Icehotel. Or the crazy days of my week running a charity golf tournament in Phoenix, Arizona, where J and I partied with Carlton Banks.

It’s not that unusual actually…

OK, maybe that trip wasn’t really shoestring travel. It was quite indulgent, and luckily on someone else’s tab! Ha! But it’s the travel stories I will be featuring in my new series of posts on Coco Hobo: The Blog. A series of nights to remember, that’s for sure!

So, pack your checkered kerchief-on-a-stick, warm up that can of hobo soup, and get ready to hit the virtual road with your friendly travelling ‘bo.

There’s a world that’s waiting to unfold,
A brand new tale no one has ever told.
We’ve journeyed far and know it won’t be long;
We’re almost there, and we’ve paid our fare with our hobo song.

Maybe tomorrow, I’ll want to settle down,
Until tomorrow, I’ll just keep moving on.

Bon voyage,

x

CocoHobo: The Resolutions


So I spent New Year’s Eve curled up in the fetal position with Milo and a hot water bottle after coming down with some food poisoning of sorts TWO SIPS after I popped the cork of a bottle of bubb, which was a gift from my friend R-Ho on my b-day. NOT FAIR. I hate wasting alcohol! Also felt like I was going to die for about 30mins, and worried who was going to take me to St. Joe’s when all the cabs would be booked for NYE. Lesson: try not to be covered in paint when posed with potentially having to ask your neighbours for a ride to the hospital. Yes, I was also in midst of a NYE paint job last night, which had to be put on hold. Which was probably for the best since the recycled paint I purchased at the Salvation Army in Milton (in attempt to curtail expenses, and stop myself from indecision over too many colour options) resulted in the auspicious “Grey” looking more like it should have been titled “Prison Cement Wall Grey” instead. Not the serene atmosphere I was going for in my boudoir. My friend M suggested we get some decorative sponges to pretty it up, which may work, but since I’m technically not supposed to be painting my apartment, it’d be quite hard to pretend the decorative sponge marks were made by the slobby boy who lived here prior.

Hmm. I hope my landlady doesn’t read my blog.*

So, yeah, here I am sat on the couch I slept on (it’s closer to the bathroom), with tea-n-toast and a dozing Milo, watching some cooking show on the W Network. They are cooking snausages. Which reminds me why I am blogging right now – because I wanted to share my NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS! Bum, bum, bum! (That was a suspenseful drumroll, FYI.)

I love resolutions. Probably mainly because I love making lists (one of my consistent hobbies), but also because I am a Scorpio and we are all about rebirth. Making resolutions allows you to start over. I also like deadlines and dates of importance. And constraint. I always say I am like water (Scorpio is water sign afterall), and without a mold I will just pour all over the place. But with some structure, I will take shape. I also love a challenge, and it’s been a while since I tested my willpower to resist something that I indulge in. This usually means food for me, but sometimes bad behaviours like “All talk no action” or “I can’t do that until I do this first.”

And on that note, less yap more tap. Er, I mean, less tap more list!

MY 2011 RESOLUTIONS:

1. No pork! I will not eat any pork products in 2011. This is gonna be rough. No snausage, beans ‘n’ chips. No pork tenderloin with hoisin sauce. No peameal bacon and poached eggs. No BBQ spare ribs. No porkchops (I don’t really eat that many porkchops, but “porkchop” is one of my favourite words). No bacon sandwiches. (I have two magnets on my fridge of U.K. signs that say BACON STREET and SANDWICH STREET… oh and a comic that says “Sure there’s the vegetarian side of me, but then there’s the side of bacon side.”) Oh god, NO PULLED PORK SANDWICH AT BEERFEST!!! (Maybe will revist this resolution in August…) The reason why I am cutting out pork is because I don’t like eating factory-farmed meats, especially mass-produced ones. I’ve already stopped eating beef (since 2004) and chicken makes my stomach hurt (I think it’s the hormones), so that just leaves pork in the trifecta of common beasts. Luckily we don’t eat lamb that much over here in Ontario, so as long as I don’t buy New Zealand lamb, it should be all good. I also try not to buy meat from the grocery store as it grosses me out (other than the occasional English banger). Meat should be purchased at a butcher’s shop! Period. And so, I bid you adieu mon petit cochon d’amour.

2. Speak French. This is going to be frustrating. I honestly think I have a blockage in the second language speaking department of my brain. I can learn the grammar rules easily enough, and the writing when relevant (I could write the Arabic alphabet after only a few lessons), but I just can’t get my mouth around the vocab. I have a Bilingual Honours Bachelor of Arts degree, but I don’t know the French word for “carpet” or “toast.” I can conjugate any verb in any tense, including passe simple, which no one ever uses outside of proper literature. I guess that’s the difference between Core French and French Immersion. My friends in highschool who were in Immersion could have conversations in French, but their language skills sucked. Maybe this is also because I know English grammar a lot better than the average bear, so it’s only naturellement that I would easily pick up French grammar rules. I am sure there’s a hidden part of my brain that does know French, I just need to whack down that blockage – because if someone speaks it to me, I can understand the gist of what they’re saying, but I respond in English. When I lived in Sweden I discovered that the Swedes and Norwegians speak to each other like this – both in their own language yet understanding each other perfectly. So, by end of year I resolve to speak French. LET’S DO THIS! Allez-y!

3. Finish & sell at least one piece of writing. I have two that I’m working on: a very short children’s poetry book about England, and a chick lit novel of 500 pages. I wonder which one I will finish?? I also have a big issue with what I publish first, because everyone always judges you forever on how they first know you. If someone meets you when you have had to take a receptionist job because you quit your closed captioning gig due to endless pornographic content (for example), they only ever see you as a receptionist. And since my writing training and forte is poetry, I don’t want to publish a chick lit novel and then put out a poetry book, only to have the reviewers say “Chick lit novellist writes poetry book!” Because chances are, they will read the poetry in a non-flattering light. Because as much as we all love chick lit, no one considers the authors to be literary experts. (Read “The Devil Wears Prada” or anything by Candace Bushnell for confirmation.) My friend ME says I shouldn’t care about the order I publish in, because I am a multi-faceted writer and should just be myself. Afterall, I can debate theoretical astrophysics and the philosophy of time in the same conversation as why it is wrong to wear open-toed, barefooted, sandals before May 1st. SHUDDER. My mantra on that: “Until the grass is green, thy toes shall not be seen!” Oh, and the universe has a destiny. See article in Discover Magazine (April 2010) for more info. But I digress. The point is, I plan to sell at least one piece of writing, and a large part of me thinks it should be the poetry first.

4. Complete the whole 90-minute Bikram yoga circuit without passing out or taking a savasana “break.” Considering I’ve been going to Bikram yoga classes on and off for about eight years (and yoga in general for 16 years), you’d think I could do this by now. But I am really unflexible. REALLY. Am considering doing an Energy Exchange at a hot yoga studio to force myself to get back into daily practice. Actually, speaking of this…

5. Do an Energy Exchange for three months at a hot yoga studio. Methinks I will probably apply to Moksha Yoga Bloor West. Moksha was the first hot yoga I ever did – well, back then they were just another Bikram studio on the Danforth – but then they changed that studio and their other one at Davisville to Moksha, and now there’s Mokshas all over the place. Even in Milton! (This is shocking because when I started practicing yoga 16 years ago in Milton, I was about 50 years younger than every single person in the class. It was not trendy back then with the young’uns. I miss those days. HATE trendy yogis!!! It’s about the peace of mind people, not the Lululemon outfit! Although my neighbour DOES work at a Lululemon… I wonder if he can get me a discount on some cute capris?)

6. Jog (without stopping to catch breath) the entire road that encircles High Park. Not sure how long this is. Will ask the Running Room nerds, they’ll probably know. This is going to be tough because I am the world’s worst jogger. I “ran” a 10k in England in 2009 with my friend S, her husband D, and her brother D. At first I was doing awesome – passing people left and right. Man that felt good. But I lost it on the downhill part. Just can’t run down a hill! Also this 10k was up and down the Chiltern Hills where I lived as a child, and in the woods for most of it, where you have to avoid ancient tree roots and pieces of flint, sheep, and all sorts of other woodland creatures (such as drunk Englishmen). Not like the ones you can run along the Waterfront in Toronto, all peaceful and flat. Nooooo! Not. Like. That. I couldn’t bend my knees for a week afterwards. I even was turned down for a job at a museum in London because the guy who interviewed me thought I was handicapped. When I said I couldn’t walk properly because I’d just done a charity run, he asked how long it was and I said 10k, and he CLEARLY did not believe me. Then to make matters worse, since I’m a livin’ joke, I couldn’t manage to get my Visitor Badge off that was pinned to my coat, and had to ask for his help. This did not benefit my handicapable stance. Is there no such thing as equality these days!? Do they not have Affirmative Action in the U.K.!? Humpf.

7. Travel to at least two countries. Considering I went to four in 2009 (Spain, Gibraltar, Britain – England & Wales, and Ireland), and then none in 2010, I need to make up for lost time. Am planning a trip to Scotland with ME in the Autumn for a whisky, gin, and beer tour. I mean, a Cultural Tour. Yahhh. Liquid culture! Woo! Also going to New York City for a weekend mini-break with friend J. Funny, this also revolves around liquid culture. Hmm. Themed travel is good, non? Speaking of liquid culture…

8. LAUNCH THE BEAVE! Yes, thirstybeaver.ca will be launching in 2011. Am so excited about this. We’re only a year behind schedule LOL but it’s been hard to work on it when J and I both have other jobs (working for myself IS a job people!). But our logo is THIS CLOSE to being finalized, and the legwork is starting this month. Whodathunk I’d actually be excited to do legwork? (This has nothing to do with #6, although maybe it would help keep me going!)

9. Teach “The Artist’s Way” workshop at least once. I keep trying to teach this and it doesn’t work out for one reason or another. But it’s such an amazing course of creative rediscovery. Julia Cameron is the closest thing to a god I have, I preach her work to anyone who will listen, and so I figured I might as well organize an actual workshop. Although I have lost out on my first choice for venue. We’ll see. I’d rather do it in the Winter/Spring than the Summer because this year I also plan to…

10. Portage in Algonquin Park. I guess #6 would help this one as well. I have portaged in Brent and Achray, and the only peripheral site left is Kiosk. I have only camped at the peripheral sites. So that’s my goal for Summer 2011. One day I hope to portage from Achray to Kiosk by myself, but not sure I am ready for that yet! There’s no way I could lift the canoe on my own. Although in 2005 when S and I were portaging in the Barron Canyon and a series of massive thunderous storms closed in on us (and we were the only people in the entire Canyon at the time), some sort of inner strength took over and we lifted the canoe full of our backpacks and firewood and food straight out of the water up onto a rocky shore about a metre above the water with only one hand each. Still don’t know where that strength came from, other than from fear! (Lightning had just struck a 60′ tree and about 20′ of its top came crashing down beside us!) And, yes, I still want to go back. Loved that campsite.

Well, that’s about it. I think the tea-n-toast has helped ease my stomach since I started this blog (about three hours ago). Am beginning to feel better. Fog is descending outside. Lindsay Lohan is on TV in “The Parent Trap” – funny how different she is now. Hmm. Maybe I should change the channel. Or go finish painting. Or maybe I’ll just have another cuppa. Afterall, “Less talk more action” was last year’s resolution!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!
BONNE ANNEE!
Och lyckligt nytt år! …that one’s Swedish ;o)

x

*All events described in this blog are fictious. Any resemblance to real persons or events is purely coincidental. Except for the juicy bits. Those are 100% accurate.